Music is something that everyone in the world indulges in. Whether you monetarily support your favorite artists by purchasing merchandise and seeing them in concert or simply just stream their music in your free time – you are a consumer of music. While everyone listens to music, the way that people enjoy it drastically changes from person to person. Some people simply pop in an earbud when they’re working for some background noise, other people play music when in a group setting for some fun with friends, and then there are those who desperately cling to music as a life buoy to save them from drowning in the turbulent ocean that is life and its consequent emotions.
For some people, music is the glue holding their shattered soul together: It’s the only community accepting of them and it brings them comfort in a way never before managed by other people. Simply put, music is the reason that some people are alive, and it is with these people who rely on music to get through their everyday life that the band Crywank resonates the most with. The heartbreaking lyrics sung by a sad person over a melancholic guitar show these people that they aren’t alone in their suffering, that someone else has felt these emotions before and that they aren’t weird for experiencing these feelings.
The antifolk duo, Crywank, isn’t exactly what you might think of when you picture a band that has been given the label of “comforting.” Considering the fact that all of their music is, honestly, abhorrently sad. However, it’s that raw emotion and despair that provide a warm environment for listeners struggling with their own inner turmoil. Jay Clayton, singer and songwriter of Crywank, translated a lifelong portfolio of depression and self-hatred into an 18-song album titled “Tomorrow is Nearly Yesterday and Everyday is Stupid” released in 2013 as the third album put out under the name Crywank.
I personally have a deep connection with both Crywank as a band and this specific album. Growing up as an emotional being with burdens weighing down your every step is quite the isolating experience, and during my lowest points, music managed to provide comfort in ways unparalleled by any person in my life. Crywank filled the hole in my heart with despairing lyrics and sub-par guitar picking. Although this is a personal experience, I believe that other people can benefit from their music, so here is my review of the album “Tomorrow is Nearly Yesterday and Everyday is Stupid.”
It’s best to talk about the opening four songs of the album as they set the mood for the entire album and reveal its core themes. “Memento Mori” is the first track, and does a fantastic job at establishing the existential nature of life that Clayton sings at length about. It is a letter to life from Clayton in which he desperately pleads for youth and to never be touched by the mysterious hands of death and the afterlife. He doesn’t know what death entails, but he pleads with life to never escape him and thrust him into that which he doesn’t know.
“Song For A Guilty Sadist” ventures into the insecurities bubbling under Clayton’s skin in excess. It demonstrates a situation where he was asked to do things out of his comfort zone, and after caving and submitting to their requests, he is struck with immense guilt over his actions. He’s scared to do these things, but hates himself for that fear and uncertainty. In a situation where all of the power is in his hands, he falls victim to his insecurities and assumes the submissive role due to that refusal of dominance.
“If I Were You I’d Be Throwing Up” leaves the realm of self-centered emotions, and shows a side of Clayton that spits vitriol at those around him. While this is a shorter song, I believe that its length adds to the impact of the lyrics. Clayton sings about not knowing how to navigate conversation with a person because of their erratic emotions, and how he would prefer to distance himself from them. He airs out his grievances and the song ends, emblematic of his relationship with this person.
“Notches” is the fourth song and is quintessentially Crywank. This is a song about people and their bad traits. The understanding that those around you distance themselves from you because of these traits of yours, and that no level of self-awareness can fix that until you actually start to better yourself. While this song is tragic in nature, as it is about Clayton being abandoned due to his mental illness, he demonstrates full awareness as to why people leave his life, but is unchanging in his ways, instead choosing to wallow in his own self-hatred and hoping that one day these people will be back.
These four tracks are merely scratching the surface of what lies within the 18-song pity party that is the album “Tomorrow is Nearly Yesterday and Everyday is Stupid.” I fully understand and believe that Crywank is not a band that everyone should like, given their depressing nature, however I stand by my claim that everyone should at least give a song or two off of this album a shot. Misery loves company, but sometimes it’s the only company accepting of you.